One of the biggest barriers to a young woman dressing with greater tzniut is the fear that she won’t be “noticed” anymore-that she’ll be out of the competition for male attention. But the question is, what kind of attention? And from what kind of males?
Let me share a cute illustrative story: (more…)
1 comment September 17th, 2008
I learned something yesterday evening that was both fascinating and frightening.
A young Israeli man came over to pick up 100 copies of Maga HaKesem-the abridged, pocket-sized, Hebrew version of The Magic Touch that people like him are distributing all over Israel. He told me he was a ba’al teshuvah, someone who became religiously observant as an adult-and a doctor.
“There’s some very important information you should include in your next reprint of Maga HaKesem,” he said, and began telling me about the hormone oxytocin and its effect upon women (which I wrote about in my July 30 posting). I smiled and told him I knew all about oxytocin. However, he had something to add that was new to me. (more…)
Add comment September 10th, 2008
I’d call myself someone who’s not too hung up on her looks. I don’t spend a lot of time in front of the mirror, and when I do, I basically shrug, think, “You’re no model, but you’re okay,” and get on with my life. But all that casual acceptance can be severely challenged if I just leaf through a typical women’s magazine. (Which is why I don’t.)
The beauty industry is poison for a woman’s self-esteem. Remember, the purpose of any business is to make money. The beauty industry does so through a simple, three-step formula: (more…)
Add comment September 7th, 2008
I was reading the other day about a young man who saw a girl and thought to himself, “Wow, she’s actually pretty! When was the last time I saw a pretty girl?”
You may think, “What’s he talking about? There are lots of pretty girls around!” But apparently he wasn’t talking about “good-looking,” “eye-catching,” or “hot.” He was talking about pretty-old-fashioned, wholesome, not-flaunting-everything-I-have pretty. What I would call true beauty. And that is increasingly rare. (more…)
Add comment August 6th, 2008
Torah-observant Jews know that the Torah prohibits affectionate physical contact with members of the opposite sex before marriage. Yet even someone committed to Jewish law may wonder: Why? What harm could there possibly be in, say, an innocent hug between a girl and a guy?
The fact is, there’s more harm involved than most people realize-especially for women. And there’s a chemical explanation for this. (more…)
Add comment July 30th, 2008
The other day a young woman told me she’d stopped seeing a young man she’d been dating for a while. She had been mentally reviewing their relationship, and realized it wasn’t what she wanted or felt she deserved. “I’m not sure how deep his feelings for me were,” she said. “I asked him, ‘What do you like about me?’ and he answered, “You’re cute.’ He likes me because I’m cute? Then why doesn’t he forget about me and get a puppy?”
People frequently ask me, “How do I know if I like someone enough that I’ll be able to really love him?” I answer, “Simple. Ask yourself why you like him.” If it’s because the two of you have nice times together, what would happen if you didn’t? If it’s because he’s bright and interesting, what would happen if you discovered he’s also selfish and immature? (more…)
Add comment July 22nd, 2008
| Head to Heart: What to know before dating and marriage |  |
| Outside/Inside: A fresh look at tzniut |  |
| The Magic Touch: A Jewish Approach to Relationships |  |